It's Father's Day in America
More on parenting, and a poem
Well, we’re hurtling toward world war, families are being ripped apart by masked ICE agents, and daddy MAGA gets a big fun military parade for his birthday this weekend. So, how am I celebrating Father’s Day?
On Wednesday I wrote about reactive parenting and state repression. Today I’d like to link to my friend John Stewart’s tender, beautiful piece, released today in Cognoscenti, about (re)learning the piano with his son Ezra. Call it awesome, non-reactive parenting. (And learning to re-parent oneself, as one also gets to do – hopefully – as a parent.)
Another piece on “parenting during the fascist takeover of America” from Bess Kalb:
And, finally, a poem from my notebooks, exactly one year ago today:
[untitled] I put you down tonight again Routine so much a revelry. Interiority fades with age, Increases in volume. Drains? I hope you know some day How much a dad can love, and did. The old song plays. You learn to pee. I take my phone and bin it. Would That I could hold your face instead.
Sometimes I really do feel like a dummy for swearing off poetry for so many years (as too much of a “luxury”), when it is one of the things that consistently brings me (& so many others I love) the greatest balm. No matter that it cannot stop bombing. What can?
To salvage any kind of interiority – our inner lives, our bodies – during a time of all-out war, both digital and material, on them – is sacred work.
In, like, the most simple, everyday kind of way.
I don’t think we can prevent the mass catastrophes of our age without preserving (re-expanding?) inner human life – if that makes sense. Even as each new catastrophe (and technological advancement) levels more and more of it. Maybe this has always been really boringly true. But I really feel it right now – with the shallowness of each breath stolen by algorithms – with the joy and relief and connection that comes with having it restored – with restoring it for myself, with all of you.
When V asked what I wanted for Father’s Day, I said I just wanted a regular weekend.
May everyone everywhere have access to this.
Much love to you all,
Adam
Been loving your musings! Thanks for doing it.